Lord's Hand: March 2009

3/31/09~ C and I have been doing a challenge the past couple weeks. We've been keeping track of our point we get for working out or reading scriptures. The challenge ended on the 28th and I find myself a bit disappointed. I didn't realize how much it pushed me at the gym. Today I was on the treadmill and I told myself I had to stay on for 15 more minutes to get my full point, then I realized no I don't. I'm going to need to find another way to push myself. I started P90X yesterday. I'm hoping it will help boost me a bit more and quicker if I work out for and hour at the gym and an hour at home every day. It's not like anyone can tell by looking at me that I've been hitting the gym every morning for the past three months. I need to do something drastic before I give up.

3/30/09~ I think someone is out to get me, no really. I have not been sleeping good lately, my poor children. Last night I didn't fall asleep until 1a.m. and Kinnzi woke me at 2a.m. to go out. I decided I was not going to try and go to the gym at 5a.m. so I reset my alarm for 7a.m. Needless to say my body woke up by itself at 5a.m. What the heck, so I went to the gym. I do feel pretty good in spite of it though. Maybe this is the Lord doing his part to help me get healthy. Someday I'm going to have to thank him, probably after I'm more awake.

3/29/09~ I had to talk in Sacrament meeting today, Ahhhhh. I am so glad it's over but man was it stressful. It's funny because I got the call on Wednesday asking me to speak and instantly ideas started coming to my head about what I should say. I hate waiting until the last minute I just get more flustered. That night I couldn't sleep so about 1a.m. I turned on my lamp and started writing my talk. It's amazing how fluid and marvelous some thing sounds that early in the morning. I think I'm closer to the spirit that early because I'm so tired that my brain is just running wild. I ended up using just about every thing I wrote so I guess it wasn't that bad. I am just soooooo glad it's over. Hopefully now I won't have to speak for another five years or so.

3/28/09~ My sisters are in town, YEAH! I love it when they come home. We went to a movie "Benjamen Button". It was a good movie even though it made me cry, that usually signifies a bad movie to me. I'm taking the higher road and saying that the movie is still good, I just probably won't ever watch it again. I wish my sisters were able to stay longer, I sure miss them.

3/27/09~ Sometimes it's nice just to be together as a family, it doesn't matter that we don't have anything to do. We drove around until we ended up at the Spring Fair tonight. It actually turned out pretty nice because there wasn't that big of a crowd so the kids were able to enjoy playing on those scooters that you sit on and swivel the steering wheel back and forth to make it go. Every year we think about getting one of those but then we ask ourselves where we'd ever play on one. Our driveway is crap, and small. Our streets are too bumpy so we'd never be able to have any fun. Who knows maybe some day we'll have a big enough driveway or something.

3/26/09~ I think taking it easy has paid off, I made it to the gym this morning. I rode the sit-down bike again and lifted weights. I still don't think I can do anything that requires me to bend over but I'm working up to that. And the best part is no doctor bills, Yeah. The bad part is, taking a resting period doesn't help with the weight loss goals and Big D starts his "Biggest Loser" competition next week. It's like he's been bulking up for the first weigh-in because he knows he can lose it so fast, jerk. After that I'm pretty sure he's going to blow me away. It sucks that men can lose weight faster and easier than women. The Lord and I are going to have some words about that one the next time I see him.

3/25/09~ I'm feeling a lot better today, I'd better because the kids all have friends coming over today and the weather is poopy so they will all be inside. Yeah for me!!! I finally figured out how to use Bugs sewing machine that she got for Christmas. So it's like Christmas morning for her she's excited to play with her "new" toy. Beaner and her friend are going to make peanut butter and jelly cookies in her easy bake oven. Bud is going to watch his new movie "Bolt" with his little friend and I'm sure Bear will tag along for that one. It is shaping up to be a nice day even though I didn't make it to the gym this morning, still trying to take it easy on the neck.

3/24/09~ I stayed down all day, not only because of my neck, but I think I'm coming down with a cold. It will be nice to just veg for one day. Lets hope it doesn't roll into two. I got a call asking me to talk in Sacrament meeting this Sunday. Why couldn't we have left town for Spring Break? I couldn't sleep last night so about 1 a.m. I wrote my talk. It's funny how at 1 a.m. any thing I write sounds fabulous, until the next day when I re-read it. I think it will be fine, at least I have a start. I at least know the direction I want to go, now lets hope it's the same direction the Lord wants me to take.

3/23/09~ A couple years ago I had a bulging disk in my neck and I couldn't move. I got some help from my chiropractor but he said the injury can be induced by stress and will probably resurface, and now it has. I was so hoping he was wrong and I was going to be an exception. I've felt my neck getting stiffer and stiffer the past few weeks but I tried to baby my neck so I would be totally disabled by it. On Saturday I was folding laundry with Bug and I sneezed and that's all she wrote. I felt a pop in my neck and shooting pain, from a sneeze. It still was no were near the pain to throw me back to the doctor but it was still pretty bad. I've been taking it easy since then as to not aggravate it more. I tried going to the gym this morning and taking it easy as to not jar my neck, that's harder than in sounds. All I did was walk on the treadmill and ride a sit-down bike and my neck started to throb so I had to go home. Maybe I should baby my neck for a bit longer if I don't want to end up with a huge doctor bill.

3/22/09~ The "Twilight" party went great, even with the unwarranted commentary from the audience. My dad had a hard time sitting through the movie, Grandma Honey said it was because there were too many distraction and they could watch the movie again after everyone left. I don't think that was the issue, but it was still funny. Bug loved the movie so much so that we stayed after everyone else left just so we could watch it again.

3/21/09~ Today we are going to help Brook with his remodel. He's trying to sell his house before He and Andy get married. They have both houses on the market, but what a horrible market to try and sell your house. Big D and I have been helping him out and then we are going to head out to Papa Guy and Grandma Honey's for our "Twilight" party tonight. I'm excited to get out of town. I think I'm going to take my camera and walk around and take pictures of the old homesteads. I love old things. They have so much life to tell.

3/20/09~ The boys and I went with Beaner on a field trip. We walked around our historic downtown and looked at all the old architecture. I love old buildings so I was excited to go. I was really surprised Bear walked the whole way without needing to be carried. I hope we made Beaner feel special by coming with her. And what a beautiful day for the first day of Spring. It was like a dream.

3/18/09~ Trying to pull myself out of my funk I went over to the junior high that's by my house to run the track. I figure I can run two miles on the treadmill I can do at least one mile on the track no problem. I've always heard that running on the treadmill is nothing like running on asphalt or even the streets for that matter. There is definitely more ups and downs to contend with so that is why I thought I should be able to go at least one mile around the track. Well, I didn't get the chance to find out because after one lap around the track one of the local high school track teams showed up to use the track. I was a bit disappointed but at least now I know when they use the track, I will just have to come back another time. If nothing else it was nice to get outside in the sunshine. I think that in and of itself helped my funky state of mind. I'm already feeling much better.

3/16/09~ Not much is going on this week. I've been a bit blue so I haven't been getting out much. Maybe next week will be better.

3/15/09~ I can always tell when I'm feeling chaotic and out of control in my own life because I start trying to control other peoples' lives, and it never works. We have a little boy in Primary that is very disruptive so I thought we should try the Super Nanny thing and put him in timeout. We cleared out a room and let him have free rain. I stood outside the door to keep an eye on him and would ask him every five minutes if he was ready to rejoin his class. He said he was ready three times but every time I got him to the door he'd throw another fit so I'd take him right back to the room so he could throw his fit. He ended up staying the entire time in the room. I don't know if that was the right thing to do or not. I'm at a loss as what to do. I know I'm not his parent so technically this really isn't even my place, but where do I draw the line when his behavior is affecting thirty other kids. HELP ME!

3/14/09~ C came up and we were able to do lunch after my Primary activity. The activity went really well. I was in charge of the games and we played life size Chutes and Ladders and also life size Clue. The kids really enjoyed them both. Afterward C and I went to Chilies for lunch. It was a good meal but I think I ate a whole stick of butter, which is not good for the waist line. No wonder their food tastes so good. I wish someone would open up a eatery that is healthy, good tasting food. I know there are sandwich shops but I can only eat so many salads and sandwiches before I get bored. Here's a thought, maybe I need to learn to cook.

3/13/09~ Big D is my hero, he helped me set up for my first big Primary activity that takes place tomorrow. He knows how to make a stressful situation fun. He involves the kids in every thing he does and helps us all enjoy each other. I am such a lucky lady to have such a wonderful and supportive hubby. I love you man!

3/12/09~ What a crappy day, I only got two or three hours of sleep so the entire day all I could think about was how bad I needed to sleep. I don't know why I couldn't sleep, but watching the hours tick by just pissed me off more and more. I so need a nap!

3/11/09~ Today is C's birthday, she is now an old lady just like me, ha ha. I guess that is kind of cruel to rub that in, but I am a cruel cruel friend. I guess that would explain why I don't have many friends. Happy Birthday C!!!

3/8/09~ After Big D got home we went to the mall so the kids could play on the toys last night. We weren't there but two minutes when Bug went to jump over a frog and landed wrong and sprained her ankle. Her foot was swollen so she had to wear her bright pink slippers to church today. She looked pretty funny wearing these big furry slipper with her navy blue dress. To be honest I was a bit jealous.

3/7/09~ With Big D gone we have a party hardy attitude. We rented movies last night and today we are going to see Bolt at the theater and out for ice cream. If we keep this up the kids are going to want either Big D or I to leave every weekend. When I was down in Salt Lake for the concert Big D spoiled the kids with ice cream and movies too. I just hope our kids never make it passed the spoiled phase and reach the rotten phase.

3/6/09~ Big D left on his snowmobiling trip with the young men. It was sad because he really didn't want to go. He is getting behind on his homework and he already doesn't get to spend much time with his kids and he's getting more frustrated every day. He did get an 'A' on his presentation yesterday. His professor even told him that he should look into being a teacher, he does so good in front of people. I've been telling him that for years. I don't know what he's going to do with that information. If nothing else it was flattering for him.

3/5/09~ My presentation is over, thank goodness. Now I can concentrate on something else for a bit. I got up every hour on the hour last night until I finally got out of bed at 4 a.m. and went to the gym. I did great at the gym until the last thirty minutes and then I was back to obsessing about this stupid presentation. Everyone showed up except Thursday night work girl so it was a good thing we covered our bums there. We had to give a ten minute presentation and it was twenty-five minutes, hopefully we don't get docked for that. I am so glad it's over with, now Big D has to get through his tonight. Good Luck Babe!

3/4/09~ I went to my last study group before our big presentation. I was a bit nervous not many would show up, because lets face it, it's usually me and one other person. Out of seven people we were only missing two people. One we've never met, she did email us once saying she couldn't make it to our meetings because she worked Thursday nights. We emailed her back saying that was great because our meetings were on Wednesday nights. The other girl had an emergency with her sister and had to take her to the hospital. So we covered our bases in case neither one showed up for the presentation and called it a night.

3/3/09~ I've been at the bank twice trying to take care of this scam on my account. It makes me want to never order anything on the Internet again. It could have been worse I guess, some people get scammed out of thousands of dollars. I'm glad I learned my lesson with just a couple hundred dollars. It still ticks me off because my family could so use that money. Oh well, live and learn.

3/2/09~ It is a good thing I only have one class this semester, I'm having a hard enough time finding the time to do my homework I can't imagine having to find the time for two classes. It seems like every time I start getting something done someone needs help, or hungry, or thirsty, or is fighting. I don't know how some parents go back full time, poor Big D. Big D is getting so frustrated with how little time he gets to spend with the family. He's thinking about cutting down to one class next semester, again. He thought about doing this last semester because he was so frustrated but then he decided he wanted to just hurry and get it over with. I guess we will see what he decides to do when it's time to register.

3/1/09~ Beaner got up and bore her testimony in Sacrament meeting. She is so brave, braver than me. I did get up and bare my testimony too. I did it for her so she would know that, even though I don't get up every fast Sunday, I do have a testimony. Beaner got a little bottle of baptism water from the Primary presidency, which I thought was a cute idea, but she dropped the bottle as soon as we got home and it broke she was devastated. She is sentimental about things like that. It's a good thing she'd gotten so much other stuff to help her remember her big day: scriptures, scripture bag, a framed picture of her and Big D in their baptism cloths, and many others. I hope she will always remember how special her baptism day was.