Lord's Hand February 2009

2/28/09~ Beaner was baptised today. What a special day for all of us but especially for her. Big D and I are so proud of her choice to take this step. She had a really good turn out. I think she got tired of being in every picture taken, she wanted to play. She was so beautiful dressed all in white. I am one proud mama.

2/26/09~ I went to Enrichment meeting tonight, we made watches. Mine turned out pretty cool. I found some curly shell beads that I loved so I got some other beads to match the shells. Of course one color is green, my favorite color. I know the shells will probably end up breaking off but until then I am going to enjoy my new watch. Now that I know how to make them I think I'm going to make some more. Maybe make different bands to wear with different outfits, not that I wear a watch a lot. I think this is the first time in about four years since I wore a watch last. Now when I want to know what time it is I check on my cell phone. I still love my watch, it's a practical functional bracelet. It suits my personality, I am very practical.

2/25/09~ We took Beaner to Deseret Book to buy her new scriptures. She also got a beautiful white baptism dress and a cute scripture bag. I was so impressed with how quickly she made up her mind. She my one that loves to contemplate all the options, very methodical. I hope she feels special and understands what a special day Saturday is going to be for her. She also got to go to Achievement Days with Bug this week for the first time. She's been waiting a long time to be able to go with her sister. Now she can be a big girl too.

2/24/09~ I ran for two miles straight today. I am so stoked I never thought I could run one mile let alone two. I am building up my endurance when I go to the gym but I'm still not losing the weight as quick as I thought I would. My brother drops his kids off every morning on his way to work. He said he's impressed that every time he drops the kids off I'm gone. He said that I am either at the gym every morning or taking an early morning donut run. I told him that if you look at me, it looks like I'm taking a donut run, but I swear I'm going to the gym. I have witnesses if I need to call them in for questioning.

2/23/09~ Lowell and Rae brought Bear to me so I could stay away a little longer. I still had to make sure I made it home in time for the kids to get out of school, piece of cake (I was about thirty minutes late, oops shhh don't tell anyone). I stopped at Tai Pan on my way home, Bear was bored out of his mind. I found a gate I really wanted so I asked an employee if she could carry it up front until I was done shopping. When I got up front I saw my gate, broken. She felt so bad, it fell over and broke some of the decorative pieces off. I was so excited when I saw that, cha ching. I asked her if she'd still sell it to me at a discounted price. She agreed to take 50% off, I probably could've gotten more but I've never been a good bargainer, I don't like to hurt people's feelings. I got the gate home and asked Brook if he could weld my gate back together and he said yes, woo. Only one problem, it's too big to go on my mantle, which is what I bought it for. Now I don't know where I'm going to put it, but that's okay because I got a good deal.

2/22/09~ Celine Dion I Love You!!! Rae and I finally got to go to our concert. We've waited over a year to go. I tried to take pictures but we were in the nose bleed section so they didn't turn out that great, okay they are crappy but I'm keeping them anyway. Celine is such a good entertainer. I can tell why she makes big bucks, she's awesome. She put on a two hour show in six inch heals dancing, jumping on the piano, and five wardrobe changes. Wow, she's so awesome. I loved how engaging she was with the audience.

2/21/09~ I am working on my homework that is due tomorrow, I know not a very exciting thing to be doing when I'm suppose to be on a run away from responsibility weekend. I am waiting for Ann to get home from a scuba dive in a crater and Marie to get home from work. After they get home we are going to the go kart races, YEAH!

2/20/09~ I left early and went straight to C's house. We had a great time getting lost looking for a cookie warehouse store, antique stores, and the fair grounds (they were suppose to be having an antique fair this weekend). You should be proud of me, I did not eat any of the cookies C bought, but I think I gained about 5 pounds just by walking through the front door of the store. It smelt fabulous!!!

2/19/09~ Run Run Run that is all we did all day: library, girls' school, Bear's school, store, my school, DI, bank, on and on and on. I am so tired and I still have homework, dishes, packing for tomorrow, and wrapping up church responsibilities since I won't be here again. I am so looking forward to running away again. I should run away every weekend, I'd probably get fired as a secretary, mom, car pooler, aunt, and wife.

2/18/09~ Big D called me up from Mutual asking if I would bring the kids up to him at the church. They were playing dodge ball and only ten kids showed up so he was recruiting. I decided it would be good exercises for all of us. We all did great, even with Bear getting kicked in the back by his best friend, Little Jon. It was a great workout and we all went home sweaty and stinky.

2/17/09~ Wow, I am feeling the repercussions of the weekend. I need to get back into things like homework, working out, and cleaning my house. It is amazing how refreshed I feel after I take a weekend and run away. The best part about it is I get to do it again next weekend. I get to go back to my sisters' for the weekend and go to Celine Dion, hopefully. Last concert I was suppose to go to she cancelled so hopefully she is feeling better and I get to listen to her sing. I am excited, it is going to be just Rae and I.

2/16/09~ I really missed my kids. I know Big D did too but he's the one who had to point it out to me. We stopped at some stores as we worked our way home and I kept finding stuff I wanted to buy for our kids. Big D came up behind me and said, "You really miss the kids don't you?" I didn't realize it up to that point but he was right. I wanted to go home and hug and kiss each one of them. I wish they would've missed me as much as I missed them, but that isn't possible when they stay at Grandma Honey and Papa Guy's house. All that spoiling keeps them occupied, I wonder if my kids even noticed we were gone?

2/15/09~ We spent the day at my sisters' house. I relaxed and Big D did some home work, he has a huge test on Tuesday. After being lazy all day we went and checked into our hotel room where we were planning on going swimming only to find out the swim pool was outside and closed up for the winter. I forgot to see if the pool was and indoor pool, oops my bad.

2/14/09~ Big D and I went to Monster Jam, a monster truck rally. We had the best time. It made us miss our little boys though, they would have loved those huge trucks especially since they have a toy of one of them: the Bull Dozer. Before the rally, or jam, Big D and I went and raced go carts. It took us back to our second date when we'd done the same thing. It was funny because on that second date is when Big D whisper in my deaf ear, "Can I kiss you?" and when I turned my head to ask him what he said he planted one right on me. After he'd pulled away and saw my huge eyes he asked what was wrong, he'd asked if it was okay. I had to remind him I am deaf in that ear. So this weekend he walked up behind me and whispered in my good ear, "Can I kiss you?" and I said yes. I was a bit confused as why he felt like he had to ask. After I kissed him he started laughing. I asked him what was so funny and he said he meant to whisper in my deaf ear. He is such a romantic.

2/13/09~ Happy Friday the 13th, muwa ah ah ah =0 Today we are running away and I am so excited. Big D and I are taking off for the weekend for our 13th anniversary, how ironic isn't it. I just hope Big D doesn't get in his head he wants to watch a scary movie to commemorate the big occasion, I don't do scary I have too vivid of an imagination. The kids are all stoked about spending the weekend at Papa Guy and Grandma Honey's house. They get spoiled rotten out there, I love it as much as they do.

2/12/09~ Bud got invited to go to another play date with his buddies. When we were picking the rest of the kids up from school the mom of Bud's play date asked if Bear wanted to come along. He was so excited, he'd been begging all day to go play at someones house but I couldn't get a hold of his friend. The first thing Bud said was, "I am looking forward to another cupcake". Last time they stopped at the store on their way home and got a cupcake. I told him he didn't get a cupcake every time he went to a play date, but he doesn't see it that way. Sure enough they both came home with cupcakes.

2/11/09~ It's official, and I finally have permission to announce: Brook and Andy are engaged. He asked her Monday evening with all their kids around. I tried to talk him into letting me stand outside the window so I could watch but I was denied. So I did the next best thing, I sent my camera with my niece to take pictures. Unfortunately, I still haven't seen my camera yet. So when I do get my camera back I will post the pictures and give more details.

2/10/09~ I watched "The Biggest Loser", and I probably shouldn't have. It usually inspires me and gives me ideas on what to try to stay motivated, but tonight it did the opposite. They have been working out for six weeks at this point in the show and they've all lost like forty, some sixty, pounds at this point. Well, I've been working out for six weeks and I'm struggling to keep the measly six or seven pounds off. I was totally bummed after the show with what little progress I've made. Everyone keeps saying to hang in that the weight is going to just melt off, but it's not. I have got to be doing something wrong because at this point all that I've realized is my lifestyle before wasn't as bad as I thought if when I'm working my butt off nothing is happening. It never fails when I feel like I'm doing great and I stand on the scale, it slaps me in the face with how little my hard work paying off. Wow, I need to buck up and quit whining.

2/9/09~ I think I partied a little too hard this last weekend, I am not feeling well. It's funny how crappy junk food makes you feel. I never noticed that before. Beaner is still celebrating her birthday, Grandma Ellen and Papa Ray took her out to dinner and shopping for a present. She is so thoughtful she came home with something for everyone, even Lynn and Brook Jr. It's a good thing they went to the dollar store. It makes me so proud of how thoughtful and loving Beaner is. I just hope she knows that some times things can just be about her and they don't have to include everyone else. I just want her to feel as special as we all think she is.

2/8/09~ Beaner's official birthday. We had a nice birthday dinner at Grandma Ellen and Papa Ray's. She asked for salmon for dinner, but I don't know if it is because she loves it or if she just knows it's my favorite. She is such a people pleaser that I wouldn't put it past her. I need to teach her that it's okay to pick stuff she likes on her special day, she only gets one a year. She is such my tender one.

2/7/09~ We had a busy day!!! We started the morning off with Brook Jr.'s baptism. It was so neat seeing him and his father in all white. I am soooo proud of both of them for the decisions they've made. I hope Brook Jr. knows how loved he is, he had quite a bit turn out. I think our group had one of the biggest followings, it was great to see everyone there to support Brook and Brook Jr.

We had a luncheon after the baptism and then we all went home and changed and went skating for Beaner's birthday. We were suppose to celebrate her birthday next weekend but it's my and Big D's 13th anniversary and we'll be gone. We sent out invitations for Beaner's party the day before so we knew not many friends would show up but she still had a good thirty people there, of course, most were relatives but that's okay. I think she we succeeded in making her feel special.

2/6/09~ It is Beaner's birthday tomorrow, Yeah for Beaner! I asked her what treat she wanted to share with her class and she said peanut butter candies. Those of you who know me know that peanut butter and chocolate are one of my biggest weaknesses. I put off making them until about 10 p.m. last night so I wouldn't have to pass by and smell them through out the evening. I didn't get to bed until 11 p.m., which made it hard to get up for the gym.

Bud, Bear, and I went with Beaner and her class to see the movie "The Tales of Despereux". The theater had a special showing just for us and gave all the kids a soda, popcorn, and a candy. My kids are not used to getting treats at the movies, because they are lucky we could afford to get into the movie in the first place. All the kids had a great time and I think it made Beaner feel special that we'd come with her. The only one that wasn't there was Bug, she had to go to her class and she let us know how unfair it was that we all got to go to the movies for school.

2/5/09~ Bud had a play date with some friends from school. He was so excited, I don't think he's ever done that before. Bear had a bit of a hard time with it. When we were picking the kids up from school, then left without Bud, Bear started freaking out. When he grasped the concept of Bud going home with friends, Bear decided the only way to make him feel better was to go over to a friends house. I could not get him to drop it, every two seconds, "can I go over to Jon's house?" Needless to say, he did not get to go and that made him upset.

2/4/09~ I had my first study group for my history class. We have to give a big presentation on March 5th, plus, write two papers by April 3rd. I remember the first time I was in college, right after high school, I was timid and still fearful, so to speak, of professors and authority figures. Now that I am older, sometimes the age of my professor, I'm not so timid. I don't fear, or even desire, the approval of my professor. I am there to learn something, they are there to teach me something, we don't have to be friends. Don't get me wrong, I give proper respect, I'm just not out for everyone to like me. I guess I'm maturing, it helps when I'm one of the oldest in my class. I don't really have any other options than maturing. I can't, and don't want too, go back in time to my teeny bopper days. I like having confidence and not relying on others view of me for my self-esteem. Maturing is great!

2/3/09~ Big D had to go into work early so I was unable to do my morning ritual of getting up at 5 a.m. and going to the gym. I think I finally understand others reactions when they say they get to a point where they crave the gym. Not working out threw my whole day off. I couldn't focus and I forgot every thing: to take Bear to school, Bug's Achievement Days, how to cope with life in general. I so cannot miss working out again, I thought I was going to go crazy.

2/2/09~ Bear and I ran errands all day. Big D called us up in the middle of our errands and invited us out to lunch. I'd promised Bear that after we were done with Wal-mart we'd go over to the mall so he could play in the play area. When he found out we were going to lunch with dad he asked if we could go play first then go to lunch. I don't think he grasps that dad has a time limit for lunch. Bear was a good sport about lunch first but he never let us forget that we were doing the play area next. He had a great time making new friends at the play area until on little boy, who progressively got more aggressive, grabbed him from behind and threw him down slamming his head into a fiberglass fish. After that he was ready to go home. I am very impressed with how well he has been playing with others. He is getting more gentle and considerate all the time. I love to watch him play.

2/1/09~ Super Bowl Sunday! The only game we watch every year, and to be honest it's for the commercials. This year the commercials sucked but the game was pretty good, especially at the end. My team didn't win but I'm used to that because I always root for the under dog. I think I may have over done it on all the good food this weekend. I'm going to have to wipe the slate clean and start from scratch on the weight loss program, that's okay because Big D over did it too.